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Such A strong But deadly word........
My Confession:
"I can't go any further then this
I want you so badly, it's my biggest wish
I spent my time just thinkin thinkin thinkin bout you
Every single day yes, I'm really missin' missin' you
And all those things we use to use to use to do
Hey boy, what's up, it use to be just me and you
Meet me halfway, right at the boarderline
That's where I'm gonna wait, for you
I'll be lookin out, night n'day
Took my heart to the limit, and this is where I'll stay
I can't go any further then this
I want you so bad it's my only wish
Boy, I travel round the world and even sail the seven seas
Across the universe I go to other galexies
Just tell me where you want, just tell me where you wanna to meet
I navigate myself myself to take me where you be
Cause Boy I want, I, I, I want you right now
I travel uptown (town) I travel downtown
I wanna to have you around (round) like every single day
I love you always... way
Let's walk the bridge, to the other side
Just you and I (just you and I)
I will fly, I'll fly the skies, for you and I (for you and I)
I will try, until I die,
For for you and I
Can you meet me half way
I can't go any further then this
I want you so bad it's my only wish"
I layed There..... Your Back toward me..... Not A word said.
I will reseal my heart to a cold hear-ted Person Thought!
I dont want to Give something My energy....
To a person That says " They all said that" Period!
" Im not like the rest, But i guess the rest Fucked it up for me"
Am I Wasting my time..... Am I here for no purpose
Just for pleasure....
All i ask Is to talk.... Oh i Forgot Your not the talking type......
My energy Will Not be wasted to Dust!
Smiles On my part..
No more confession!
Can I tell you a story as we dance while the sun starts to bleed
Song of songs love is calling daughter wake up from your sleep
Refined I'll become the most dazzling precious treasure
I'll be treasured over all the earth
Bearing the gift of a new heart
Patience ablaze I'm slowly burning
Refined ill become the most dazzling precious treasure
Ill be treasured over all the earth
I am in awe and in shock
I'm in love and given away
I'm reserved with these words:
Can I tell you a story as we dance while the sun starts to bleed
Trees rejoice with the wind here
Hallelujah, Yes Shua
Tonight I've become the most dazzling precious
I am treasured over all the earth
Just look at what he's done
How he's laying down his life
Take this life
Oh most dazzling precious treasure
I wanna be there for you
Someone you can come to
Runs deeper than my bones
I wanna be there for you
Cause I hear the whispered words
In your masterpiece beautiful
You speak the unspeakable through
I love you too
My ladies.......
My steps.....
My reasons.....
My Heart Beat....
My Drunken nights....
My reason For holding my hair up when im Throwing up....
My smiles....
My boyfriends......
My heart breaks.....
My tears......
My fears.....
My destiny.....
My lovers..........
These are the reasons why their in my life.....
Their souls make me...
They Take me with my Flaws....
They Give me advice....
They Bring me soup When Im sick....
They shake there ass when im Doing so...
When i fall In love they there to listen.
Through my depression
Through my sickness.
They never judged!
They never left me alone to suffer....
They always understood!
They always kept It real..
If i fucked up they will tell me.
They kept me in a straight line.
They are my valentines, my Christmas, My new years kiss!
There my personal stylist and my Simon. Mary is my Paula!
You Guys Are My spine.......
I thank you to, Ebony, Kathy, Leah And Mary,
My bitches, Sluts, Whores!!!! { Whore is Ebony LMAO} I LOVE YOU GUYS!!!!!!!!!
Love is Blind......
Love could make you do the most foolish things.
Could make you turn against your true friends,
Your family.
Its makes you reveal your most valuable treasure.
and not even notice how expose you are.
They take your weakest memory and turn it against you.
You as a person in love dont even notice how much hurt they causing you
yes i will say it again love is blind.
You feel like your in Cloud 9
You feel so high.... You never want to touch the ground.
how can love be so devious!
how can it cause so much pain and hate to your heart,
when people sugar coat it to be something so beautiful and harmless.
Love....
yeah it look so pretty that word...LOVE.
I been Victim of Blind Love....
Some people just don't open up again.
They shut their heart and never let anyone in
They don't want to feel that pain again.
So me as a person that experienced Blind love.
And been through suffering,
Should i shut my heart.
No!!!!!!!
I wont, i still believe in true Love and its out there!
I will not give up on something beautiful, honest and pure.
I will crawl back into love......... I have stumbled to a path of happiness.
Could it be true love, HEY MAYBE.....
I wont give up... i wont threat him different because of the last man mistakes.
He is new, fresh and sensitive.
He doesn't discourage me from feeling happy.
He gives more than the reason to smile harder everyday!
Yes love is blind.... But i have learned my past..
I will Grow from my experience.
I will become better Friend, Woman and Lover.......
I just experienced a Supernova In my heart.
I pain that i cant bare.
Twisted in a ball on the floor.
Tears Flowing down my face.... Cant speak.
Damn this pain,
I don't want to feel a thing.
This isn't a pain that Makes me hate a person in the world. This is pain of over whelming happiness.
A pain that Brings tear but with a smile to end the course.
This is an explosion of Love.
I get up from the floor and walk to this amazing gift from god.
I tell Him" Thank you".......
" Thank you For being True And honest to my heart. Thank you For Giving me Pure Words. Thank you for holding me in the dark Nights. Thank You For Calling me your girl. And For Showing me a World that a girl will never let go."
I seal with a Kiss.
A kiss that hold That makes the world go slow-mo
The kiss that make us feel like weir Flying.... Flying back to love.......
My heart experience a Supernova
In pain?!
Yes
An Addicting pain that i will never want To leave.....
A pain that Brings a smile To my face...
It you.... The man of my dreams....
Thank you!
Conversion disorderRheumatoid arthritissjogren disorderThis is what i have in my life....
Not ganna lie it tough.
The past year been the hardest year,
Hospital. In and Out!
I thought i was going to die twice.
I thought i was never ganna walk ever again Three times.
I thought i was Crazy the hole year!
They couldnt explain my condision.
They kept telling me that " Its in my head"
I knew it wasn't.... But at the same time i though i was going crazy!
In march 09 I went in the hospital For two weeks with out walking. Numbness in both legs. I major head ache. And depression. I had thought Of killing My self.
I just didn't understand.
I had a very Trusting and helpful Doctor. Dr. Isreal. May be the only person that understood me and i Trusted.
She was my Angel through all this.
She wanted to make the decision To Put me a phyc ward.
Im not even ganna lie, I was so scared! Took my cell away, everything i owned.
I was going in there for depression.
To help face my fears.
While i was there i had to find out what triggers my bad thought and anger.
I was there for 5 days.
And i found out what was wrong.
The thing that triggered My bad thought and pain was the image and voice of my mother,
Isnt that crazy my own mother!
Every move i make i hear her voice. Or see her image in my mind yelling at me with her devious look like she always has.
When i came out the hospital. I felt like a newer person, because i knew what i had to do.
Just stayed away and clear my thoughts.
so i did... For A lil while.
Came back Home and my Thoughts came back!
No One Knows. Dont Plan to say anything.
Im trying To start My life.
Well Because arent On my Back 24/7 They cant see my moves of improvement,
well i really only have to do it for my self.
Im trying Im my way To fIx me.
But by Making me feel Worthless and Make me feel useless.
It just makes it worst and pushing me away.
So far that you wont even know where im at.
Out of state.
This will happen.
When it does the they will look at them selves and ask " what did i do"
Just watch..... Not now.
Im not ganna give up my life yet. I'm still ganna try and fix it Till my last breath! Just
this hate i have must go away.
Till i fix my self i will continue writing, Listening to my ipod, Laugh. Try to be happy!
Let pray for the best!
My one person that wont judge and understand as family is DJ...... Thank you. I love you!
I have taken My emotion and hidden them.
Ive done pretty well doing that...
One couldn't discover my mood.
I have hidden my true identity.
I be put into blame for not sharing my self.
I be put into guilt for keeping my self to my own heart
But really am i to be blamed?!
Once i open my golden gates to my heart, The man with a sword stabs my fragile heart...
How dare you!
Then asked for forgiveness.
Me as a fool; do so.....
Now a stand in front of this shaded mirror,
Seeing my struggled eyes.....
Telling my self in my mind that love will not open these golden gates,
No man will find the hidden treasure.
Could you blame me?!
" Sticking to me", i say....
"To me"....
I have changed my color to please.
I have changed my shape to be wanted....
I lost me.
To regain my thought... I will go back to my natural step of being me...
Me?
I am unique.
I have a smile that no one has.
I create words that my heart only speaks.
I have the look of a woman of hope.
Scars of strength.
Stars of faith.
This is me.
Now i Look at my self..... I see Me.
The eyes Full of Hope.
No fear.
The shade fades away...
I see my smile.
Then i see love.
I see this man standing beside me..I feel the power From his body.
My Mind goes back to sorrow thought!
Could i fear, Should commit my heart into the gambling of love.
Pursuit Of Happiness.... Chase!
This fear is here. The comfort too.
Should i gamble.
1,2,3....
Taking a breath
4,5,6
Exhale!
7,8,9
Looking up
10
I Love You!
Damn How the years Passed me by......
I remember The first say we stepped out the Plane.
The first day we became new yorkerz,
You was holding my hand. My lil baby.
Your First day Pre-K.
First day you Did your Homework alone.
First Dy you learned how to clean your own ass...LMAO
Yeah the yearz passed me by....
Now your 15 yearz old and you a young man......
You Grown up to be Your own person
Dont take shit from No one...
You have Your own style
Your own mind
Your a honer student In high school
A great Friend
And Great eye For art!
Im so proud of you!
Your my best Friend...
I dont hide Nothing From you...
You dont judge me and you always kept it real To me....
I dont see you as my lil Brother.... I see you as my age, and that crazy! LOL.
But i love you with all my heart
I will do anything for you.
Just Promise me you will finish school and
You will never change....
Stick to this... You have the eye for art...
David Joel Flores Theirs only one of you.......
Life is like a Roller coaster.
Then It Drops.
But why should i Scream For This is my Theme park!
Damn what can i say about my life...... Its not simple.
My moments of tearz happen a lot lately....
Love is the only thing keeping In faith....
Keeping on my toes.
I feel like I just seen the sun for the first time
He makes my life bright cause He shine
It's me and you baby, it's our time
I'm living my dream, cause He's mine
He got me skippin' down the street
And singin' love songs all out of key
I didn't smoke nothin' but I feel so high.
He's my new obsession,
I feel on top of the world with Him
I'm gonna rock his body all night
He makes me wanna sing.
Back on track... Just had to express my self~ Anywayz School is a bitch
Im trying to start back up in january But i cant because i owe them 800 buckz!
Then Im trying to find a way better job but theirs nothing out there.
uggggggggg
Im stressed! OD!
These Tearz wont stop....
This pain wont Go away!
My back Hurts
My knees are killing me because of the cold...Arthritis is a bitch!
I just want to cry and cry and cry....... I NEED A HUGE!!!!!!!!!
" Im a lair. Im a thief. { Lmao}. I Dont do nothing with my 
life { But i dont stay home all day and let my life pass me by}. I didnt pass my GED Exam { Wait i Finished High School, Class of 07 Thank You very Much}. I dont bar-tend
{ Hold On i had And have a job, Wait More Than one Job I had... Holy Shit i have a life} I dont go to college because i never passed my GED Exam { BMCC, Look it up its a school!!!! There actually school out there! lol}. Lynette You Not Doing Nothing With Your self... So lets Talk Shit about you and fuck Up your name For my own Entertainment Because i Dont have a life....... { Yes i do agree}
Hey My Name Is Maice Lynette Flores. And Im 21 years old. I work as A Dispatcher. I graduated high school { Pelham prep acadamy} All Senior Year i was in the hospital But STILL Graduated. { CLAPS For me} Pretty Proud of my self....... Had 5 job From the age of 16 Till Now.... Damn i have a life.... Crazy! I go To BMCC.... Start My Spring classes in January. Dont got Kids Dont do Drugz.... Yeah I drink.... Amen! Used To smoke Weed But stopped! I got money. Dont rely on The government to help me! Im smart...... I respect My mother and I actually help her. I dont talk back to her because THATS MY MOTHER! The women that gave birth to me..... I dont bring shit to her house because this is HER HOUSE!!!!!!!
I have Lupus.... Its painful and challenging. But it will never take over my life.
I have haterz. I have people talk shit about me for there entertainment because They have no life.
Want to get to know. I must trust you. Then Youll know the real Maice!!!!!!!!! Till Then
Just look at the picture!
